August 31, 2007
Discipline: The Dirty Word In Parenting
Tip! Understand that differences can be good. Believe it or not, children can benefit from differences in our parenting styles.
How does it feel when you hear the word DISCIPLINE? Do you have a fearful image of someone standing over you to make you do what you did not like? Did the standover person have a belt, cane, or some other object of fear to enforce the directions given?
Have you ever experienced this yourself? Relax! I am not going to take you through some horrific experience that you had in the past. I would like to share with you something that can help you. The disciplinary processes that you use can help you and your family. These simple process will help you have a peaceful, quiet, and loving home. Your children will be happy and well adjusted .
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Without discipline there is no learning, there is no loving and there is no joy. In anything you do and want to achieve in life you must have discipline. For it takes discipline to stay and finish the tasks that you set out to do. Consistency is the key to the best that life has to offer you and using discipline, consistency is the magic that makes it all work.
As you well know that children like to test their parents and see how far they can go, or how much they can get away with. During the developmental years children like to throw tantrums to try to get their parents to do what they want. So what do you do when your child throws a tantrum?
Interesting question, as there are many answers and situations that can occur. Considering this, I would say it depends on your relation with your child and how you have been training your child. If you have been open and always talking to your child then you would discuss this with your child and explain the reasons and the child would accept. Then if you have not had this sort of relationship, you have a child yelling at the top of their lungs and carrying on. What I would suggest is that you let the child finish the tantrum, this usually takes a fair bit of fight out of them. Then calmly tell your child the reasons why they could not get what they wanted. Continue calmly with what you were doing and let your child come to their senses. After the child has calmed down you can discuss set rewards and penalties for differing behaviours. Make sure that you are consistent in your application of these rewards and penalties.
Tip! Prioritize Your Time: To be an effective parent, you must be able to spend quality time with your child and yourself. You must make every minute count to try to reach a balance between your academic life and your parenting responsibilities.
One the most important things about discipline is that you set up consistent parameters that the child will always operate in. It is like setting up a square around the child and when the child steps outside this square they will know what will happen each and everytime that they step out. It has been found that the happiest and the most well adjusted children had discipline in their lives that was consistent and well defined. So children knew where they stood without any misconceptions. The kids will love you for this.
You as a parent need to establish a disciplinary code in your home. Where you and your family feel comfortable. Nothing like the military code! With discipline in your home you will have peace of mind and you will know that your kids are growing up in a well adjusted way.
Tip! By thinking through and discussing the parenting plan, possible problems can be identified and resolved before the final judgment is entered by the court.
Andrew Borodin
http://www.parent-child-help.com
Andrew Borodin is a retired teacher who helps people with their kids. He is passionate in seeing kids growing up to their potentional in life.
www.parent-child-help.com
